Create a Routine that Helps You and Your Children to Thrive

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A few years ago, when I was struggling as a momma to two littles ages three and six months, I read one of my favorite books on time management for mommas- Steady Days: The Journey Toward Professional, Intentional Motherhood by Jamie C. Martin. It was so helpful for me, that I try to re-read it every couple of years, and it has made several of my reading lists here on Surviving Toddlerhood. The book covers many aspects of motherhood, but it centralizes on creating routines that help you and your children to thrive.

This is one of my favorite quotes from the book: “I am not a perfect mother. Often I struggle with impatience; sometimes I lack the enthusiasm I long for. {Preach it, Jamie!! I’m right there with you!}  I make many mistakes, just like my children. As they are maturing as children, I am maturing as a mother. In any career, experience allows us to grow, improve, and learn. But unlike many professions, many of us mothers have never had any training to prepare us for this new job filled with diapers, tantrums, and sleepless nights. We need to equip ourselves with practical tools that allow us to give our best to our young children, helping us thrive in our strengths and overcome our weaknesses. We aim for professionalism in every other area of our lives; why should our children get anything less?”

If you are looking for good encouragement on creating a routine that will enable you to have steady days with your children, I highly recommend that you check out this book. The chapters are short, usually between two and four pages, which makes it easy for busy mommas to read. There are several different routine creation methods covered in the book, so you are sure to find one that is perfect for you!

Creating a routine that helps you to thrive in the season of littles is doable, even though at times it may seem like it isn’t even possible to nail anything down. But before we start making a routine we need to take a step back and look at the big picture.

How to Create a Routine that Helps You and Your Littles to Thrive

1.     Decide what your priorities and goals are.

If you have been here a while, you may have noticed that I am big on planning and goal setting. It makes life so much easier when you know what you are aiming for. This is a step that you cannot skip as you seek to create a routine that helps you and your toddlers to thrive.

What are your priorities each day? What do you hope to accomplish with your child? What are you seeking to teach your littles?

Take fifteen to twenty minutes and write down the things that are your priorities and goals for your weekdays.

2.     Break up your goals into small bites.

If you have “have the house clean every evening” on your priority and goal list, I can guarantee that you are going to meet with disappointment many times. With littles, and bigs, it just isn’t going to happen every night. But, if you break down that goal into smaller steps, you will be able to feel more accomplished at the end of the day. So, make a list of smaller tasks: Monday- clean the bathroom, Tuesday- vacuum, Wednesday- mop the floors, Thursday- dust, Friday- go through all the paper piles, etc. then add in the daily things like washing the dishes, laundry, and whatever else you do every day.

If one of your goals is to read a chapter book aloud each month with your children, map out the book and see how many chapters this would equal to per day, keeping in mind that you might not get to it every day, and the age of your littles who would be sitting.

3.     Remember that you don’t have to have every moment of your day planned out.

Leave some time in your daily routine/flow for free spontaneous outings, free play, and life in general. Even though you are making a routine, I can guarantee that you will have days where things are going to be off a little. That is fine. Make sure that you aren’t feeling bound by your new schedule, rather make your routine work for you. I have personally found that we do best with a morning flow leaving the afternoons more open for catching up on things that didn’t get done earlier.

4.     Try out both strict time blocking and a loose flow.

With time blocking you can be strict or loose. You can order your days so that you are always getting up at the same time and then giving each half hour/ hour/ two hours a different task or set of tasks and only working on those things during that time, or you can simply say “I want to work on (fill in the blank) for thirty minutes, read books with the littles for one hour, then accomplish this household chore in the next twenty minutes.”

I like going even one step further and simply having a list that we work down in order like this:

Wake up

Breakfast

Devotions

Workout

School

Lunch

Reading

Nap

During the time that I am doing devotions and working out, my boys have different things to do, they will be using that time to clean their room, have free play, work on Awana memory, or playing with the baby. We also only use this routine three to four days a week. The other days we have to be out of the house early, we usually just get breakfast and do a few quick chores before leaving.

By trying all of these options in routines you will be able to figure out what works best for your family and not feel boxed in to one person’s favorite routine choice.

5.     Implement your new routine slowly.

If you are someone who is quickly overwhelmed by change, and even if you aren’t, I suggest implementing your new routine slowly. For the first few weeks, you may just want to walk through the morning portion of your routine, then you can add in the afternoon and evening parts later on.

We usually leave our afternoons free from any type of routine, rather those hours we leave open for errands, outside play, possibly craft time, and fun with friends.

Remember that different times in your life you will have different routines.

If you have a newborn, you work outside the home, own your own home-based business, have a spouse who is at home for any reason, you are homeschooling high school, etc. your routine will change. Even from month to month you may find that you need to change things up. Make your routine work for you, don’t stress about following your routine to a T all the time. Life happens. Each day will have its own obstacles. Work with those times and give yourself grace.

Remember that your to-do list and the housework will NEVER be done.

There is nothing new under the sun. You and your family will always be making dirty laundry and dirty dishes. There will always be things left to do on your to-do list. Enjoy your babies while they are babies. Don’t become legalistic about checking off all the boxes or a clean house Nazi whose children fear making children’s messes.

With a good routine you CAN thrive in the season of littles.

 

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